In 1987, Terry Waite was kidnapped by Hezbollah militants and spent 1,736 days (almost five years) chained to the wall in a dark cell in Beirut.
Most people will never be in such an extreme situation, Waite says, but might find it useful to learn how he coped.
Terry Waite Photo: Supplied
- Listen to Terry Waite's 2017 conversation with Kim Hill here.
In 1980, as the Archbishop of Canterbury's Special Envoy to the Middle East, Waite helped negotiate the release of hostages in Lebanon.
Seven years later, Waite tells Jesse Mulligan, he was a hostage himself – with no idea whether he'd ever be released or even survive the day.
"Chained to the wall, sleeping on the floor, no natural light, no books or papers, one visit to the bathroom a day and… pretty austere treatment. I was subject to torture and they had a mock execution. It wasn't an entirely pleasant five years but one survived it.'
When you're taken hostage, you have to manage a high degree of anxiety and uncertainty, Waite says.
Early on, he knew that if he dwelled too much on the negative he'd easily fall into depression.
Instead, he tried to use his mental abilities to focus on the positive.
You don't know your true inner strength until you're put to the test, he says.
A few days before his captivity, Waite had visited Alcatraz with his wife and son, where they spent three minutes in the pitch-black 'punishment cell'.
"When we came out [of the cell] I remember saying I would never be able to stay in there… I thought that would be awful. And then of course two weeks later I was in a dark cell for almost five years and somehow was able to cope with it…"
When he was first captured he said to himself 'no self-pity' - and tried to keep in mind the many people who'd been in even worse situations.
'There were slaves who began life in chains and died in chains - a whole lifetime. You've only had a short time comparatively speaking [he told himself].'
Although Waite doesn't love exercise he even did that in captivity.
'There's not much you can do on the end of a chain but he'd read a book for pilots about exercising in the cockpit and he did those exercises.
Terry Waite in 1993 Photo: Public domain
Although around the house we all "mess around in dressing gowns and what have you", it's essential to maintain your dignity even in isolation, Waite says.
When Waite's captors gave him pyjamas to wear, he laid his trousers under his mattress to press them.
In the time of Covid-19 and self-isolation, people under a lot of pressure, Waite says.
But while he had to endure the anxiety alone, there's no need for anyone else to go without support.
"If you've got anxieties, if you've got worries, try and take the opportunity to share them with somebody … don't just bottle it up, don't just press it down. If you press the problems down they'll resurrect in another way and cause you havoc."
Waite is reflective about the on-flow from the coronavirus lockdown, which has restored a sense of community and belonging to his village.
'Everybody in the world, right across the board, we're all vulnerable… which reminds us, I think, of our common humanity.'
"In some respects, it's as though nature has given a pause to breathe again. Because now the clouds are being lifted. You can see the Himalayas for the first time.
"It makes you ask the question – what price are we paying for the advancements that are taking place and do we have to rethink that?"
Terry Waite OBE is a writer and humanitarian. He has spent the last nine New Zealand summers in the Hawke's Bay and hopes to return here next summer.
