Highlanders player and former All Black Nehe Milner-Skudder is part of a growing number of athletes speaking about the importance of mental health.
He's been sharing some of his stories and advice through the mental health platform Clearhead, which he got onboard with a few years ago.
Milner-Skudder tells Jesse Mulligan why he's chosen to be part of this platform.
Milner-Skudder hopes people can connect with the stories he shares and find some strength to talk to loved ones or seek help.
"That's a common perception in society in general, whether you're an All black or any other normal human being, you sort of have to have things figured out and live that perfect life.
"I know for me, that's where I struggled ... like having rugby sort of taken away in terms of not being able to play through injury took a massive toll on my identity.
"I gained a lot of self-worth through what I was doing on the rugby field and how that translated to me getting that fulfillment.
"It's not all world cup medals and trophies and scores and tries, there's a lot more to it than that ... we're not immune to mental health issues or struggling just like the rest of people out there."
He wants to emphasise to upcoming players that having a good or bad game shouldn't equate to your self-worth.
"Especially in rugby, [I'm] trying to stress that to young players coming through, is that rugby is just what we do and it's not who we are, and it just plays a small part of our lives and we continue to grow as people."
He himself had no clue on how to measure or look after his mental wellbeing prior, he says.
"I look back on my physical injury and it's easy to rehab from that, you follow your physio and doctor ... and I've got all these markers that I can follow step by step.
"Whereas if you're struggling mentally, you don't actually know what those markers are, or I didn't at first.
"It took a whole lot of open and honest tough conversations. It was a bit of a healing process for me, understanding why I was feeling so down and depressing, where that was stemming from.
"After numerous, countless chats with my wife, family, friends, seeking professional support, and just talking in general, I think that definitely opened my eyes and mind and heart how I want to go about things and how I see myself."
Photo: PHOTOSPORT
Through his journey, he came to understand the numerous and valuable roles he has in his life - from being a husband, brother, cousin and mentor - other than just being a rugby player.
"I'm able to put my attention and focus and positive energy into these areas and that helps in my overall wellbeing and getting up each day."
He believes that athletes and players talking about mental wellbeing should be normalised rather than always being characterised as bravery.
"That sort of relates to a bit of stigma, it's hard to differentiate how we are on the rugby field to when we are off it in terms of what that toughness and strength and brave and courageousness looks like."
He says the general environment of suppressing emotions to not show 'weakness' needs to change.
"I think we just need to have a bit more compassion and understanding around how people express their emotions and what's the healthiest way to do that."
Clearhead's website and app provide mental wellbeing resources, which Milner-Skudder says can help complement your own approach to staying well.
"I was in a hole and I know it's normal and through life you go through patches, I don't want people to sit in those bits for too long.
"So just sharing my story to hopefully help others out there know it's part of life but then give them some strategies that I use to get back on track and trying to remove that stigma.
"I know the theme around the mental health awareness week [this year] is 'take time to korero', I think that's a big push and a strong message I want to encourage people as well."
Where to find help:
Need to talk? ( 1737 - free call or text)
The Depression Helpline (0800 111 757)
Healthline (0800 611 116)
Lifeline (0800 543 354)
Samaritans (0800 726 666)
Youthline (0800 376 633)
Alcohol Drug Helpline (0800 787 797)
What's Up? - Helpline for children and young people (0800 942 8787)
