The trial is occurring at Auckland District Court. Photo: RNZ/Marika Khabazi
The lawyer of a "career" musician accused of domestic violence said he acted in self-defence against physical attacks by his former partner.
The man said to have worked in the music industry has interim name suppression.
In the Auckland District Court on Friday, appearing via video, the complainant told the jury the defendant, her ex-partner, strangled, punched, threatened to kill, and hit her over the head with a full 1.5-litre plastic bottle on separate occasions between 2022 and 2023.
The physical abuse got progressively worse throughout their relationship, she said.
The final straw for her was when he pulled the hand brake multiple times when she was driving in a moving car, she said.
The complainant filed a 105 online report with police in January 2024.
The defendant has denied all charges, including four charges of assault on a person in a family relationship, two charges of threatening to kill, two charges of assault with a weapon, suffocation, and threatening to do grievous bodily harm.
In court, defence lawyer Susan Gray alleged the woman scratched her client's arms and face multiple times in August and October 2022 and in May and August 2023.
She said the woman also damaged his guitar.
During cross-examination, the woman accepted that at times she had high levels of anger towards her ex during their relationship.
But she told the court she only got angry with provocation.
"I would retaliate to him abusing me."
She claimed her ex tried to strangle her after she posted a "bikini selfie" while they were on holiday in Bali in August 2022.
"He grabbed me by the neck and I think he jammed my arm in the door and I hit my head on the door frame and I scratched him at some point during this."
The woman filed a police report against her ex after the holiday, but at the time chose not to take the complaint further.
During the relationship, she said there was an unfair power dynamic between the couple because of his notoriety in the music industry and because he was more than 20 years older than her.
"He would always tie [his music career] in with, 'You'll never do better than me'.
"He said I would be nothing without him," she alleged he told her.
She said her ex was also "verbally abusive" and "controlling" while they were together, telling her to delete all men other than relatives from her social media accounts.
She said he eventually made her delete social media to "prove she was not a ho".
Gray suggested messages between the pair showed the woman did not like her ex being on social media during their relationship.
The woman said at the time she thought it was unfair and a double standard that her ex-partner had followers who were woman because they were "fans who appreciated his art".
She said she "mirrored his behaviour" towards her and was not acting like herself.
When asked if she had text messages showing the man being controlling or verbally abusive to her, she said her ex became conscious of messages after her first police report.
She admitted she bombarded the defendant with phone calls and messages throughout their relationship but said he would do the same to her.
She denied her messages towards him were abusive but conceded they were harassment when probed by Gray.
Gray claimed the man was ready to walk away from the relationship after their trip to Bali, when the complainant wrote him a letter, apologising for her "unacceptable actions".
The woman said this was her feeling like she had to apologise for sharing a picture in a bikini.
In the two-page hand-written letter, she apologised for "off-and-on behaviour" and for the man having to deal with her "self-conflict".
She said she was referring to her indecision about whether to stay with him, not "dramatic mood swings" as the defence suggested.
Gray questioned why the letter did not mention any aggression from the defendant and claimed the complainant was the one who attacked her client in Bali.
The trial is set to continue next week.
Where to get help for family violence:
Women's Refuge:(0800 733 843
It's Not OK 0800 456 450
Shine: 0508 744 633
Victim Support: 0800 842 846
HELP Call 24/7 (Auckland): 09 623 1700, (Wellington): 04 801 6655 - push 0 at the menu
The National Network of Family Violence Services NZ has information on specialist family violence agencies.
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