30 Nov 2024

The good, the bad and the ugly of mumfluencing

6:55 am on 30 November 2024
Maria Foy.

Maria Foy. Photo: supplied

Mumfluencers often show the happy, picture-perfect moments of parenting. The reality is sometimes darker.

The dark side of 'mumfluencing', which is monetising the mummy lifestyle using social media, has been on display recently.

Child abuse, fake kidnapping reports, and pulling children out of school permanently to fulfil social media commitments are among the growing list of serious issues in headlines lately.

And then there are the privacy concerns, when children grow up and no longer want their faces and personal stories broadcast all over their mum's pages.

On The Detail, popular Kiwi mumfluencer Maria Foy talks about why she started mumfluencing, and why her content has changed. The straight-up, straight-talking creator of 'Happy Mum, Happy Child', and 'Life of Maria' recently pivoted from a focus on her kids to herself.

She started posting about mum life and her two children nearly 10 years ago and has built up a solid following - her Instagram account alone has more than 80,000 followers - and she is now making more money than she did at her old full-time office job.

Mumfluencing can be big business, she says.

"It started as a top up [for the family income] but then I absolutely made an income from it. I didn't make six figures, but I know people making six here, easily," she says.

"When the kids were little, I got so many products given to me - from socks that gripped their feet to help them pull them on better to squeezy pouches to put yogurt in. The market for mums and young children is huge.

"We even got a trip to Australia one year with Netflix, as a family, and we had a lot of fun."

She documented all those moments, with a raw, real, and entertaining tone. And her loyal social media following quickly grew to 600,000

But this year, she announced a brand change. The kids would no longer be the focus - she would be.

"After thinking long and hard about this I feel it's time to pivot from this thing I started almost 10 years ago as my children are older now, and they don't want to be shown on social media in the same way they were as young kids," she wrote on Facebook.

"I started HMHC to document the activities I did with my kids and now that they're older, I'm focusing more on family stuff and of course myself. Which is why I think the shift is necessary."

Her kids were six months and 18 months old when she first began posting. Now they are 10 and 12.

"They were very aware of what I did, and I did my best to get their consent," she tells The Detail. "But earlier this year my [10-year-old] son said 'I don't like you taking photos of me and putting them online ... I don't want to do that anymore' so he revoked his consent and so I don't post photos of him online. I totally understand."

What she cannot comprehend is the lengths that some mumfluencers go in hopes of getting followers and attention.

Kathleen Sorensen, an American mother of two and mumfluencer, was found guilty in 2023 of knowingly filing a false police report in which she accused a California couple of attempting to kidnap her children in a store.

"This is a big conversation. I have just seen something very similar and I think it is Munchausen syndrome by proxy, for attention online. It makes me feel sick because I know there is more to it than just wanting followers. There must be some sort of mental health issue going on. But it is a real issue and a real problem."

Earlier this year, Ruby Franke, a former mumfluencer from Utah who ran a YouTube channel about her family life, was jailed after pleading guilty to multiple counts of child assault.

"There are a lot of people willing to get the follow and get the money. It's not my vibe. I look at this and I feel sad."

Foy has some simple advice for mums who want to influence.

"Don't set out to monetise it - set out to have some fun. You never know what will happen. As long as you are in it for the right reason, anything can happen."

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