Why we need to stop using the phrase 'toxic masculinity'

When it comes to modern manhood, there is both good news and bad news, Professor Flood tells Saturday Morning.

The good news? Most men support gender equality, and three-quarters reject the traditional, rigid model of masculinity which expects men to always be strong, in control and rigidly heterosexual.

The bad news? A “significant minority” still believe males should be dominant in relationships and feel pressured to never show weakness or emotion - a red flag for mental health struggles and increased suicide risk.

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The belief that feminism has gone too far and women now have all the advantages while men get all the blame isn't accurate, but it’s quite common among young men, Flood says.

To counter that and promote healthier ideas about masculinity, he has identified three strategies:

1. Acknowledge the harms that young men face, including isolation, depression, difficulty forming romantic relationships and bullying.

“Boys and men do struggle, whether it's in schooling or in terms of violence against boys and men, which is largely [perpetrated] by other boys and men.”

2. Provide alternative solutions to the ‘manosphere’ that aren't about bashing feminism or blaming women.

The influence of the so-called manosphere - “an online network of anti-feminist groups and communities” - can drive a wedge between the genders, and doesn't actually provide support and connection, Professor Flood says.

“[These groups] tend to have quite rigid and toxic ideas about being stoic and so on, rather than offering genuine support.”

There is a need for spaces online and offline that offer support and mental health services to boys and young men who are feeling adrift, he says.

3. Offer online and offline support, including men's groups and mental health services.

“We need strategies in schools and elsewhere that really speak to the sense of pain or marginalisation that some men and boys feel and offer genuine, evidence-based solutions.”

TikTok, Instagram and YouTube need to take more responsibility for the algorithms that direct young users toward harmful content but banning teens from using social media wouldn't solve this problem, Flood says.

“If we haven't taught young people critical media literacy skills in assessing content and negotiating their lives online, then they're going to be in trouble.”

Attitudes towards gender are hard to shift, he says, because they are embedded in our media and culture, often part of family socialisation and also sometimes shaped by sexist peers.

Growing levels of sexism and violence among boys and young men are also exacerbated by online porn, which routinely depicts men treating women in sexist and degrading ways.

“A 16-year-old boy who's already got some kind of sexist and aggressive attitudes towards girls and women will be more attracted to pornography that shows that and that eroticises or shows that in sexy ways.”

“In turn, that pornography will have a greater impact on him than on a boy who doesn't have those ideas, who was raised in more gender-equitable and sensitive ways."

Strong male role models, especially if they're dads, can have a significantly positive influence on a boy's self-esteem, he says.

“Fathers can be really vital role models in their sons' but also their daughters' lives by passing on healthy, nurturing, non-violent models of how to be in the world.

“Boys and young men cannot be what they cannot see. We need to put in front of boys and young men positive role models, whether that's in the form of their fathers or musicians, sporting heroes or men in popular culture.”